If we ever needed the Lord....

we surely do need Him now! So, goes the gospel tune I grew up singing and hearing. I began blogging yesterday about this new year and how I would hold on to this new freedom I feel. However, I was snatched backed into the pain and turmoil I thought I had temporarily escaped while celebrating the new year in our midnight high praise service. During an earlier conversation with my sister she reminded me of the woman in St. Louis who had taken her life and the lives of her 3 year old and 11 year old daughters. The newspaper article stated there was a four-page suicide note that proved it was definitely a murder-suicide case. My sister initially told me about the story New Year's Day and I can remember being overtaken by such a feeling of helplessness. Now four days later I'm still feeling the pain. In fact I have been so saddened by it that I have had to ask the Lord to just lift it. There are so many parts of this story I've walked out in my mind. The first thing that struck me was that this woman was believed to be homeless. So, being 5 months pregnant and a little less than thrilled this story resonated with me. Don't panic and start sending me emails about the blessings of children because I'm well aware and will leave my feelings about this pregnancy for another time. However, the thought of no stable place for my babies to lay their heads is more than I can handle. The newspaper article didn't give much detail about her life but the fact that she left a four-page suicide note indicates she certainly had one and a host of things on her mind that she needed to get off. My thoughts have been preoccupied with what the letter contained. Was she tired of being homeless? Disgusted with trying to figure out where their next meal would come from? Did she write about losing her job or having her car repossessed? Was it "baby daddy drama" or the lack thereof? I have no idea what her letter contains. I can only imagine the pain, hurt and frustration that prompted such a letter and then the hopelessness that served as a prelude to the final act. I've been reeling back and forth from tears to anger. Why is it that you can get a gun easier than you can obtain housing in this country? She shot herself and children on the streets with a handgun. She didn't even have a place that she could call her own to end it all. With her on the street corner was her bag of worldly possessions and the two things that probably mattered the most, her children. Now I'm wondering if she had praying, supportive sisters in her life? Was there someone willing to help my sista' carry her heavy load? Did she know the Balm in Gilead?
There is an overall national increase in the number of women and children who have become homeless over the past few years. I can personally attest to the increase in homeless single women that we see and serve at Breakthrough. I really wish there was a five point solution that would ensure that the tragedy described above is never recorded in history again. I don't have five points to resolving this crisis or a recommendation to the church or government. But, I do hope and pray that each of us will be diligent about doing the very best we can for those in our world. Kind words are good and helpful ,but if we can do more shouldn't we? The Word of God encourages us to bear the infirmities of the weak. I pray that we will be strengthened enough to bear the burdens of others. Perhaps a word of encouragement or a stable place to live could have changed the disposition for this mother of two. I don't know but I'm certain if there were ever a time that we needed the Lord we sho' do need him now!